My Boyfriend Is Ready for a Makeover. What Do I Do?
I am about to embark on an extensive manhunt for a man that I have been dating for about two months, and I’m absolutely flummoxed by the outcome. He just seems to keep bumping into walls and walls and walls…and no, I am not talking about the dance floor.
He has become more and more reclusive in our relationship – I can’t even think of the last time he spoke to or even shook my hand. He claims he has just gotten too busy and his time is “heated up” as he says. I thought that he was very cool and reserved when we first started dating, but recently, he is becoming quite low key and more like a recluse.
This is after the gal who did my makeup for my birthday a while back absolutely flipped out on him because he couldn’t keep it together (I was, like, 22 at the time) and decided he doesn’t have time for a makeover with me. She said she wanted to “kick him out” and that she didn’t trust him when it comes to cosmetics.
How do I put a fork in him? Do I really want him to end things with me?
I don’t know if I can help you here. So here are a few things you need to know. You can have all the makeup tips and tricks in the world, but if someone is not ready to take that leap into total transformation, then, do not demand that person undergo makeover or not (unless you insist that you will get a makeover first).
Essentially, this is the same as asking your dentist if they are going to cut your tooth out. I know, right? In a world where people are always pressuring themselves to live and die on every single little detail of their appearance, I get it. I’m sure that it is just a matter of time before that guy walks into your physical space with the entire element of your life still hanging in the balance (pun intended, of course). If you are ready for a change, here are a few things you can do to smooth things over:
Give him time. If you want to break up, you have time to decide whether or not it’s right for you. If you can’t give him time to change, then, he needs to call it a day. Having expectations can suck the life out of you. Instead, be prepared to be content with the fact that he is on his way out the door; and just move on to the next, better one.
Give him space. There is nothing wrong with giving him the freedom to change (though I am sure it is uncomfortable to do so). It does make you look a bit vindictive, but be thankful that he is willing to give it a try. And if you try something, maybe you will be pleasantly surprised and see it’s actually fun to look your best.
Express your need. Everyone wants to be loved and respected and adored. If he doesn’t understand your feelings, just explain them so that he realizes that you want your independence and you may need a break. In these uncertain times, men just don’t have the patience for less than an honest conversation.
Go for it. This guy does seem to have a lot of promise…at least for right now. He clearly has a distinct sense of style that would make both me and any women that look up to him want to curl up in his lap and cuddle. He has an interesting sense of humor. He seems to think outside the box when it comes to the fashion industry. He is a little more upbeat and easy going than me. He’s sweet and hilarious. In all honesty, I can’t wait to get my hands on him. Do you like what you see?